Help Desk Humor

Tuesday, October 21, 2003

Way off topic.... I really do not have a place to ramble without people knowing it's me.... well, except here. So - do humor me today....

I have heard of people who wake in the night to find an apparition of someone they love, or something they don't even know for that matter, standing at the foot of their bed. I only wish I could find out if it was true or not.

You see, my dad died this year. And a lot more has been going on as well - a lot. My husband and I are not getting along very well - something I think that was coming in due time. Who knows.

I am sitting today, in my office, crying. I know you all probably are like "are you a fruitcake?" but really, I am. This morning was a rough morning - words tossed around - words that cut deeper than any weapon anyone could use. He even showed up here to explain himself. But the more he explained, the more he only made his comment earlier in the van more concrete. I don't know what to do anymore. And it feels as if he spends his waking hours trying to think of ways to make me feel more confused - so I do not see what is really in front of me.

So, what does this have to do with apparitions and the like?

I sit here crying, and am praying that I could have a vision of my dad... something to tell me what in God's creation I am supposed to do. Do I be the "honorable wife" and stick it out for how long and just feel this way forever till I die? Or should I leave him? divorce him - some guidance. Any guidance.

Or maybe just a hug to tell me that things will work out in due time. That would be nice.

Its hard being here, alone - the one person that truly unconditionally loved me gone... its hard. I have always been independent. Never really having to worry about making decisions - they seem to come naturally to me. But I am torn with this. My religious "proper" upbringing - or making another attempt at being happy.

I didn't want my kids to be from a broken home. It was never my intent. I never thought I'd be "that" woman. The one that was divorced raising her kids on her own against all odds. I don't want to be that woman - but how is marriage supposed to go?

Are you supposed to say mean things to one another? Are you supposed to feel nothing when you walk around the house and do meaningless chores over and over and over again? Are you supposed to feel anything? How does marriage feel? A real marriage.... one that has lasted - or did it last because it was "supposed to" because vows were said?

How do you know when your marriage is normal? How do you know when it's not?

I don't know....

how about that apparition dad - it would be good right about now.

¶ 9:53 AM

I survied Blogathon 2003

the adventures and antics of an analyst in a help desk world

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More HDH in the Archives!

06/29/2003 - 07/06/2003
07/06/2003 - 07/13/2003
07/13/2003 - 07/20/2003
07/20/2003 - 07/27/2003
07/27/2003 - 08/03/2003
08/03/2003 - 08/10/2003
08/17/2003 - 08/24/2003
08/31/2003 - 09/07/2003
09/28/2003 - 10/05/2003
10/19/2003 - 10/26/2003

Some of my favorites:
Miss Cashier - always #1

Ki Words
Humorous Tumorous
Because I'm the Mommy
Notes to Self

My Disclaimer: This blog is not meant to hurt anyone's feelings (why it's written using no names) - but prove to you that HD personel are people too.

Be kind - reboot.

Do you have a question for Miss Help Desk? Email her at miss_helpdesk@yahoo.com.

Miss HD only works 5 days a week. Look for updates around 4 or 5 pm CST during the work week. Weekend entries are a bonus, but not guaranteed.

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